I think it was Kerry Packer that said ‘We’re all whores, what’s your price?’. And this week we learned that the England cricket team’s price was $20,000,000 – and had a good laugh, at their expense, into the bargain.
The Stanford Super Series gave us alleged controversy and some excellent cricket, though England rather over indulged on the former when they should have binged on the later, and concluded with a crushing, humiliating and expensive defeat for Kevin Pietersen’s band of miserable men.
The ‘Stanford Super Series’ or ‘20/20 for 20’ was supposed to be a festival of 20/20 cricket, designed to satisfy two mistresses, firstly Sir Allen Stanford’s capacious ego and second, England’s players disappointment at being unable to take part in the IPL. Much of the controversy stems from the fact that a lot of the press, ancient ex-cricketers whose opinions count for bugger all and the public at large found it distasteful that the ECB should genuflect, with quite so much enthusiasm, in the direction of Stanford’s bank account, and that consequently ECB Chairman Giles Clarke should be whipped through the streets of London before being burned at the stake on the square at Lord’s for demeaning the England Cricket team.
The comments about Stanford has been even worse, admittedly he didn’t help himself, if you’re going to have a camera follow you around the place make sure you’re seen engaging in charitable works, saving the environment or kissing babies. However, the hilarious sight of Allen Stanford with a bevy of beauties, one of whom was sitting on his knee, which was beamed across the Caribbean via the big screen, turned out to be the England player’s wives and girlfriends. The girl-on-knee turned out to be Matt Prior’s pregnant better half. Apparently he wasn’t best pleased, standing out in the middle and then suddenly seeing his wife cavorting with a Texan billionaire on a 60ft high screen. I hate to sound shallow, but if someone was prepared to give me $1,000,000 for three hours work, I think I’d let a bit of podgy-old-man-flirting-with-the-young-ladies pass without too much fuss. Anyway, since when did the England team come over all puritanical? Stuart Broad was ‘gobsmacked’, another unnamed player said he’d have punched Big Al – Jesus Christ boys! The ladies in question, giggling away, hardly looked like they were having a bad time.
The press, of course, where up in arms, the Daily Mail leading the campaign of righteous indignation. A paper of course that has no qualms about publishing pictures of ‘respectable’ totty cavorting whenever the opportunity arises (Liz Hurley, Jemima Goldsmith, girls who’ve just received their A-level results etc etc etc). Their problem, as ever, is a seething, insidious racism that pervades all that the Daily Mail, and most of the rest of the British press, spews forth. Had Sir Allen Stanford been a ‘real’ ‘Sir’, there wouldn’t have been a squeak from the media, but no, Stanford is an American, ergo, he has too much of an ego about him, is too flashy with his money and probably drinks blood directly from the udders of a herd of satanic donkeys. Well, so what? If I were a multi-billionaire I’d have a bit of a strut about me and generally feel quite pleased with myself. He may well wander around Antigua like he owns the place, well, he probably does own most of it, so deal with it.
I bear Sir Allen no ill will at all. He had an idea as a businessman and as a cricket fan, and he had the means, as a very wealthy man to bring it about. Yes he’s an American, and didn’t ‘respect’ the sanctity of the dressing room and sparked a thousand other diplomatic incidents over a plethora of so-called cultural misunderstandings. Did the ECB not check out the way Stanford might conduct himself and the tournament before they signed up? I’ve watched a number of domestic Stanford 20/20 games, and could have told them that it wasn’t going to be like a test match at Lord’s in 1904, but oh no! The American’s tournament was too gaudy and err... American.
Very few people have been prepared to find anything positive about the whole thing – well look at his team. The West Indies have been an absolute bunch of layabouts for years. How much sloppy fielding, ill-disciplined batting and inconsistent bowling have we seen? Now look at them after 6 weeks of 12 hour training days, curfews and a proper dietary regime. They were electric in the field, batted like they meant it, with vicious, clinical intent and bowled beautifully. Darren Powell? A perennial underachiever if ever I saw one, was devastating in this competition. It wouldn’t surprise me if we suddenly saw a rapid rise in all forms of cricket for the Windies, and who’s money and vision paid for it?
Exercise in vulgarity the Stanford Super Series may well be, but it is here to stay for the next four years, so the ECB and the England team should stop being such a bunch of whinging old woman and try and enjoy themselves. If they need to reorganise things a little, like getting someone from ECB or WICB to sort the pitch out then so be it. But please, this is a series in its infancy, don’t write it off yet and be grateful that unlike most people in this world you could guarantee your future with three hours work.
The enforced, casual indifference mixed with a vignette of arrogance from the England team was actually embarrassing. You put the England shirt on – regardless of whether you are playing the Stanford Super Stars for $20 million or Venezuela for £2.50 – it means something.
What was rather more positive about the whole ‘winner takes all’ situation, was the reaction of the West Indians/All Stars. Their salaries from playing cricket are nothing compared to those of the England players, add in all the sponsorship money that the likes of Pietersen and Flintoff get paid, and you are talking about some seriously rich people. Pietersen was apparently offered a £200,000 a year bat sponsorship deal from someone, which was turned down flat, so I’d love to know what Adidas had to cough up to get His Royal Highness on board.
The Super Stars simply wanted this prize more – it meant more to them and much as it pains me to write it, they were deserved and comfortable victors. Next time I hope England cut out the bullshit moralizing about the inappropriateness of the prize money, their bitching about Sir Allen Stanford, complaining about the facilities (a lot better than most county grounds according to Atherton) and grab this amazing opportunity with both hands.
Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
Woody Allen (1935 - )
The Stanford Super Series gave us alleged controversy and some excellent cricket, though England rather over indulged on the former when they should have binged on the later, and concluded with a crushing, humiliating and expensive defeat for Kevin Pietersen’s band of miserable men.
The ‘Stanford Super Series’ or ‘20/20 for 20’ was supposed to be a festival of 20/20 cricket, designed to satisfy two mistresses, firstly Sir Allen Stanford’s capacious ego and second, England’s players disappointment at being unable to take part in the IPL. Much of the controversy stems from the fact that a lot of the press, ancient ex-cricketers whose opinions count for bugger all and the public at large found it distasteful that the ECB should genuflect, with quite so much enthusiasm, in the direction of Stanford’s bank account, and that consequently ECB Chairman Giles Clarke should be whipped through the streets of London before being burned at the stake on the square at Lord’s for demeaning the England Cricket team.
The comments about Stanford has been even worse, admittedly he didn’t help himself, if you’re going to have a camera follow you around the place make sure you’re seen engaging in charitable works, saving the environment or kissing babies. However, the hilarious sight of Allen Stanford with a bevy of beauties, one of whom was sitting on his knee, which was beamed across the Caribbean via the big screen, turned out to be the England player’s wives and girlfriends. The girl-on-knee turned out to be Matt Prior’s pregnant better half. Apparently he wasn’t best pleased, standing out in the middle and then suddenly seeing his wife cavorting with a Texan billionaire on a 60ft high screen. I hate to sound shallow, but if someone was prepared to give me $1,000,000 for three hours work, I think I’d let a bit of podgy-old-man-flirting-with-the-young-ladies pass without too much fuss. Anyway, since when did the England team come over all puritanical? Stuart Broad was ‘gobsmacked’, another unnamed player said he’d have punched Big Al – Jesus Christ boys! The ladies in question, giggling away, hardly looked like they were having a bad time.
The press, of course, where up in arms, the Daily Mail leading the campaign of righteous indignation. A paper of course that has no qualms about publishing pictures of ‘respectable’ totty cavorting whenever the opportunity arises (Liz Hurley, Jemima Goldsmith, girls who’ve just received their A-level results etc etc etc). Their problem, as ever, is a seething, insidious racism that pervades all that the Daily Mail, and most of the rest of the British press, spews forth. Had Sir Allen Stanford been a ‘real’ ‘Sir’, there wouldn’t have been a squeak from the media, but no, Stanford is an American, ergo, he has too much of an ego about him, is too flashy with his money and probably drinks blood directly from the udders of a herd of satanic donkeys. Well, so what? If I were a multi-billionaire I’d have a bit of a strut about me and generally feel quite pleased with myself. He may well wander around Antigua like he owns the place, well, he probably does own most of it, so deal with it.
I bear Sir Allen no ill will at all. He had an idea as a businessman and as a cricket fan, and he had the means, as a very wealthy man to bring it about. Yes he’s an American, and didn’t ‘respect’ the sanctity of the dressing room and sparked a thousand other diplomatic incidents over a plethora of so-called cultural misunderstandings. Did the ECB not check out the way Stanford might conduct himself and the tournament before they signed up? I’ve watched a number of domestic Stanford 20/20 games, and could have told them that it wasn’t going to be like a test match at Lord’s in 1904, but oh no! The American’s tournament was too gaudy and err... American.
Very few people have been prepared to find anything positive about the whole thing – well look at his team. The West Indies have been an absolute bunch of layabouts for years. How much sloppy fielding, ill-disciplined batting and inconsistent bowling have we seen? Now look at them after 6 weeks of 12 hour training days, curfews and a proper dietary regime. They were electric in the field, batted like they meant it, with vicious, clinical intent and bowled beautifully. Darren Powell? A perennial underachiever if ever I saw one, was devastating in this competition. It wouldn’t surprise me if we suddenly saw a rapid rise in all forms of cricket for the Windies, and who’s money and vision paid for it?
Exercise in vulgarity the Stanford Super Series may well be, but it is here to stay for the next four years, so the ECB and the England team should stop being such a bunch of whinging old woman and try and enjoy themselves. If they need to reorganise things a little, like getting someone from ECB or WICB to sort the pitch out then so be it. But please, this is a series in its infancy, don’t write it off yet and be grateful that unlike most people in this world you could guarantee your future with three hours work.
The enforced, casual indifference mixed with a vignette of arrogance from the England team was actually embarrassing. You put the England shirt on – regardless of whether you are playing the Stanford Super Stars for $20 million or Venezuela for £2.50 – it means something.
What was rather more positive about the whole ‘winner takes all’ situation, was the reaction of the West Indians/All Stars. Their salaries from playing cricket are nothing compared to those of the England players, add in all the sponsorship money that the likes of Pietersen and Flintoff get paid, and you are talking about some seriously rich people. Pietersen was apparently offered a £200,000 a year bat sponsorship deal from someone, which was turned down flat, so I’d love to know what Adidas had to cough up to get His Royal Highness on board.
The Super Stars simply wanted this prize more – it meant more to them and much as it pains me to write it, they were deserved and comfortable victors. Next time I hope England cut out the bullshit moralizing about the inappropriateness of the prize money, their bitching about Sir Allen Stanford, complaining about the facilities (a lot better than most county grounds according to Atherton) and grab this amazing opportunity with both hands.
Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
Woody Allen (1935 - )
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